Wednesday, May 30, 2007

It's dry

With the last significant rain fall more than 2 weeks ago, a lot of grass is drying up.

Athletic Talent

Sports are easy. I recently got an email from an old friend telling me that he was going to run his second marathon. He went on and on about his rigid training regiment and how he wouldn't be able to recover from even one lapse in his plan even though the event was four months away. Although I am proud of him for setting a goal that I have no doubt he will achieve, I completely disagree with his logic. Why? Because training the body is a waste of time. Why do something over and over when it only counts once? That’s like going on more than one date with someone.

Once you realize that so-called “athletic talent” is all in your mind, it becomes a simple matter of selecting the sport that maximizes your Chick Attractiveness Potential, or CAP. You think Johnny Third-String on the football team is going to get more chicks than Johnny World Champion Javeler? Javelier? Javelinist? One who throws a javelin. Individual sports are where it’s at.* Women are simple creatures: Too much movement makes it difficult for them to focus. Lend them a hand. Select a sport where the target is clear: You.

*notable exception: Laser Tag

Included below is a selection from my forthcoming self-help book, “I’m Gonna Teach You How to Live.”

Zack’s Guide To Athletics

Running: Start running. Don’t stop.

Bowling: Roll heavy ball into pins. Wear funny shoes.

Long Jump: Jump. Long.

High Jump: Jump. High.

Bull Riding: Hold on. After 8 seconds, let go. Run. (See Above)

Jai Alai: Jai. Alai.

Speed Skating: Skate fast. Turn left.

Horse Racing: Sit on horse.

Rock Climbing: Find a rock. Climb it. Don’t fall.

Diving: Jump into water.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Chicken or the egg. Which one is web 2.0?

I hear lots of "water cooler talk" where I work about web 2.0 issues, concepts and ideas every day. Some discussions are very technical while others are quite the opposite. One of the most prevalent web 2.0 concepts is that of the mash-up. In it's simplest terms this is the combining of two or more separate entities to form a new entity. Pop culture has adopted this in the form of music over the past couple of years as they combine the lyrics of one musical track with the sound and beat of another. These songs are becoming more and more popular all over the world in dance clubs and late night radio every day. I sometimes find myself wondering how many fans of this music are aware that it's conceptual ideas are based on the largest internet trend since the tech boom of the late 1990's. I also wonder how those who are not aware of this could be so clueless. Then, the other day I realized that I too was clueless about the tie of one of my favorite ways to relax and web 2.0.... The Colbert Report. This satirical daily look at politics skates between the categories of news and comedy and be doing so it mashed these two tv formats into a new one. Granted, this is not the first...actually I think Saturday Night Live may have started this in the 1970's when that shows writers began the weekly news skit that still runs today. But that illustrates exactly how long this idea has been in existence and it illustrated a point that I hadn't realized before. Web 2.0 is not creating new ideas, but rather just trying to expand on existing ideas. Hmm, interesting.

Monday, May 14, 2007

Sunday, May 13, 2007


Today Barbie and I went to the Belvedere Plantation to pick fresh strawberries.